Not a Ray of Sunshine, But Close

A follower gently reminded me that I never posted this recipe, so here you all go. It’s proof that I’m weak-willed and if you annoy me enough I’ll do anything (just kidding, but truly thank you for the reminder).

These mini cheesecakes are proof that good things come in small, emotionally fragile packages. Like you. Like me. Like those mason jars I’ve had since 2017 “just in case.” Well, case met.

Let’s start with the obvious: this is not a health food. These are the kind of cheesecakes you eat directly from the jar while muttering “I’m fine” and ghosting your group chat. Creamy, rich, tangy little monsters sitting on a graham cracker crust like a throne of lies. Topped with a dollop of lemon curd so bright and zippy it almost makes up for your personality this week.

I cut the original recipes in half because A) math is hard but waste is worse, and B) it’s me, a grown adult, hoarding desserts in 4 oz jars like a raccoon in a Williams Sonoma. The lemon curd is dead easy and wildly worth it—none of that store-bought nonsense that tastes like sadness and preservatives. This one’s all sunshine, butter, and delusions of control.

Take these to a party if you want people to think you have your life together. Or don’t. Keep them for yourself and eat them in bed while watching a documentary about a cult leader with oddly good hair. Either way, they’re a hit.

And yes, you can use whatever topping you want. But if you skip the lemon curd, I’m not mad—I’m just disappointed.

Mini Cheesecakes with Lemon Curd (Halved Recipe, Makes ~9 mini jars)

Crust:

• 3/4 cup (75g) graham cracker crumbs

• 1.5 tbsp (19g) granulated sugar

• 3 tbsp (42g) melted unsalted butter

Filling:

• 8 oz (226g) full-fat cream cheese, room temp

• 1/4 cup (50g) granulated sugar

• 1/2 tsp vanilla extract

• 1/2 tsp fresh lemon juice

• 1 large egg, room temp

• 2 tbsp sour cream, room temp

Lemon Curd:

• 1/4 cup fresh lemon juice (about 1–2 lemons)

• 1/2 tsp lemon zest

• 1/4 cup (50g) granulated sugar

• 1 large egg

• 3 tbsp (42g) unsalted butter, cut into cubes

Instructions:

1. Preheat oven to 325°F (163°C). Line a muffin pan or use 4 oz mason jars on a baking sheet.

2. Make crust: Mix crumbs, sugar, and butter. Press ~1 tbsp into the bottom of each jar. Bake 5 minutes.

3. Make filling: Beat cream cheese and sugar until smooth. Get the aggression out, or be normal and use a stand mixer. Up to you. Add vanilla, lemon juice, egg, and sour cream (if you insist on making everything hEaLtHy you could sub for greek yogurt here, the tang works well). Mix until just combined. Pour over crusts.

4. Bake jars for 18–20 min until centers are slightly jiggly. Cool completely, then chill at least 2 hours.

5. Make curd: In a saucepan, whisk juice, zest, sugar, and egg over medium-low heat. Add butter gradually. Cook until thickened (~5-7 min). Strain if needed. Cool.

6. Assemble: Top each chilled cheesecake with 1–2 tsp lemon curd. Garnish with crushed graham crumbs, lemon zest, or your broken dreams.